I feel like I may be very (not) good at hiding the reality that I am ________
Who the fuck isn't?
The major difference between an individual's feelings and basic temperament is that feelings tend to make up one's basic temperament. The word temperament implies one's overall pattern of emotional response; it is an emotional factor that remains constant regardless of the circumstances. On the other hand, feelings imply a specific emotion in response to a particular event or situation
I feel like these often don't match up, and maybe for good reason.
I think and daydream, often, of my childhood: my youth. Did I miss something?
I could be very (mostly) wrong in thinking I had it more together when I was 13 years old than I do now.
It's always 13.
Thirteen is the age that I feel like I was at my best.
I yearn to be my 13 year old self again.
I was tough and tender in ways that I cannot even fathom now. I had a personality that was definitely 'Ashleigh'
I go by Ash now.
And it's even strange to hear my name. I am always called out to in pet names. To hear anyone say my actual name feels strange: you don't say my name.
I always think this is strange.
I feel uncomfortable.
I've been wanting a lot of wanting lately.
The fact that the wanting is from myself makes it more difficult/hard(er).
I rest a button for myself today yet I find myself falling into old habits.
I wrote about it today. I was so proud of this!
My (hundreds of) resets give me hope.
We all like reset buttons. We do it all the time.
Maybe this is me being like everyone else.
(not wanting to be)
I am like everyone in a million and more ways.